Failure

I'm BACK! I'm Back! I'm Backkkk!!

An angel with whole new life.

An angel with no more placing love as the main in her life.

She found out that there's not worth from now on.

Am I a failure? Over this 16 years in my life, everything goes smoothly and didn't face any 'BIG' problem before. I always heard of people saying that "time can not be wasted". Also, there's a proverb "Time is Gold".

In the year of 2003, also the year I'm sitting for UPSR. I still remembered if you have fail your bahasa melayu subject means you need to waste one year to go for "remove" class instead of form one. Luckly, I did pass my BM and successfully entering to form one.

Also, during the year of 2006 (PMR), is good to say that even you pass or fail your PMR also manage to enter to form 4. However, for getting a better future, I changed school to Sri Cempaka from Pudu Girl School. It is true that there's a much different between this two school in the sense of better environment and better education. Came to form 5 (2008), also the year of SPM, the only three subject that I prepared well are just bm, math and science. So, you can imagine what's my return?(bad). However, once again, Angel is successfully get over it and enter to college.

I always heard people saying that college's life is much more relax compared to primary and secondary school. I admitted that first few week of college is relax but not in the long-run. There's tons of homeworks, assignments, presentation, tests and so on catching you. Supposingly should be relax campared to last year because from 11 subjects decrease until 5 subject to study only. only 5 subjects???yup, ONLY 5. It is much easier to handle your studies. Unfortunately, things went upside down. Do you ever experienced the lowest marks in the class? Do you ever fail all the subjects in your exam? Yes, I did all for this year. I broke the record. In college's life, no one is going to guide you but only you, yourself. The worst part is, the so called 'pass' and 'fail' will determined you can enter degree or not. This means that 'fail' is consider as you have wasted not only money but also TIME.

Different people different opinion. Some may said is not a waste although you didn't receive any certificate because you gain knowledge or literacy. I'm still not sure what's my opinion. What I know now is I just fear of facing it. I didn't experience before. This is my ever first time in my life. And this consider FAILURE in my life?

I always believe that God is fair to everyone. Everyone must have at least good in one thing. I have been searching all the way round but still in a lost. Am I seriously good in nothing? Why I'm still in a lost? When can only I find it? I have been living with no direction in this 17 years.

Failure is failure. :( (just admit it)

I changed a lot.